BT, it broke my heart for you, and all the people who loved him, when I read of Ozzy’s death. I’m keeping all of you in my thoughts and prayers as you work through this process of living without him.
I know what you mean when you say you feel guilty. Our minds and hearts yearn for logic and sense when someone is gone before they have gotten to enjoy the pleasures of growing old and knowing the beauty of a slower, simpler existence with time to take it in fully. We wonder why they have been denied, or even cheated out of, this time when others, even ourselves, live on. Has some mistake been made? Didn’t we make some of the same bad choices? Have we somehow been deemed more worthy than the one we lost and if so, how can that be?
All I can say to you is this – I have learned that there is no sense to be made of it. There is no logic. It’s a freakin’ crapshoot, when you get right down to it. Yes, we should and do try to hedge our bets by being careful and taking precautions and avoiding the things that will harm us. But then sometimes, a bus comes out of nowhere and it’s all for naught.
I’m not trying to sound grim or fatalistic. I’m saying that I’ve learned not to spend too much time on the fairness or the why’s or the what if’s. Instead, remember that you were granted the gift of having Ozzy as a friend and he was granted the same gift in you. He is not more or less precious because his time was short. And hold tight to the greatest truth in life – one that you already know. Love fully those in your life today because none of us are guaranteed tomorrow.
Hugs for you and all of those left behind. And Godspeed Ozzy as he makes his way to his next adventure.
