If you’ve ever been on the internet for any length of time, you know how easy it is to become involved in an online argument. It seems to me that they are becoming more and more common on this forum so I thought I'd spend some time and try to figure out the causes of these arguments and how we can all prevent them. Here are the conclusions that I have come to:
Problem: Rapid Fire - When we see a post online that “lights our fire”, sometimes we are too quick to hit the Reply button causing us to say things that we might not otherwise have said.
Solution: Take a minute…count to ten…and resist the temptation to get your thoughts on the screen the minute they pop into your head. Reread your post before you hit the submit button.
Problem: Transferring Anger - When someone posts their position on an issue and another poster disagrees, they see that person as a representative of everything they hate about the issue and they take out all of their frustration on the poster.
Solution: Sometimes when we are posting we forget that we are talking to human beings…living people with real feelings. It’s okay to disagree, it’s not personal.
Problem: Miscommunication - People sometimes get angry when they misinterpret what another poster has written. Sometimes it’s a joke, or playful teasing…not intending to hurt anyone. Sometimes the poster is just having a bad day or may be tired.
Solution: Don’t get your feathers ruffled. It may just be a careless remark or the way you are interpreting it. When you are participating in a forum, sometimes it helps to have a thick skin.
Problem: Walking the fine line - Not unlike kids, some posters are constantly trying to see just how close they can get to the line without actually breaking the rules. Many “Linewalkers” have it down to an art form, their post starts out harmlessly enough and they just have to get that one digg in just to flame another poster.
Solution: You can’t control another person no matter how hard you may try so if you are on the receiving end of a “Linewalker’s” subtle diggs, let it roll off you back…eventually they will tire of not being able to get a rise out of you and the “fun” will be gone. If you are a "Linewalker", recognize it and stop being a pain in the ass for not only the person you are trying to flame but the mods and admin.
Added:
Problem: Gossip - Talking about other people in a PM.
Solution: Remember that it's a PERSONAL message between two people. Keep it between yourselves. If you feel uncomfortable talking about that person, tell the person that you are having the PM with that you really don't want to discuss it and leave it at that don't try to add fuel to a fire. We are all adults here and there are a multitude of personalities in this forum so it is only normal that some people will butt heads and it is much better to vent about a person in a PM than it is to put it out on the open forum.
If any of you want to add your thoughts…feel free…I promise I won’t get my panties in a wad.
Problem: Rapid Fire - When we see a post online that “lights our fire”, sometimes we are too quick to hit the Reply button causing us to say things that we might not otherwise have said.
Solution: Take a minute…count to ten…and resist the temptation to get your thoughts on the screen the minute they pop into your head. Reread your post before you hit the submit button.
Problem: Transferring Anger - When someone posts their position on an issue and another poster disagrees, they see that person as a representative of everything they hate about the issue and they take out all of their frustration on the poster.
Solution: Sometimes when we are posting we forget that we are talking to human beings…living people with real feelings. It’s okay to disagree, it’s not personal.
Problem: Miscommunication - People sometimes get angry when they misinterpret what another poster has written. Sometimes it’s a joke, or playful teasing…not intending to hurt anyone. Sometimes the poster is just having a bad day or may be tired.
Solution: Don’t get your feathers ruffled. It may just be a careless remark or the way you are interpreting it. When you are participating in a forum, sometimes it helps to have a thick skin.
Problem: Walking the fine line - Not unlike kids, some posters are constantly trying to see just how close they can get to the line without actually breaking the rules. Many “Linewalkers” have it down to an art form, their post starts out harmlessly enough and they just have to get that one digg in just to flame another poster.
Solution: You can’t control another person no matter how hard you may try so if you are on the receiving end of a “Linewalker’s” subtle diggs, let it roll off you back…eventually they will tire of not being able to get a rise out of you and the “fun” will be gone. If you are a "Linewalker", recognize it and stop being a pain in the ass for not only the person you are trying to flame but the mods and admin.
Added:
Problem: Gossip - Talking about other people in a PM.
Solution: Remember that it's a PERSONAL message between two people. Keep it between yourselves. If you feel uncomfortable talking about that person, tell the person that you are having the PM with that you really don't want to discuss it and leave it at that don't try to add fuel to a fire. We are all adults here and there are a multitude of personalities in this forum so it is only normal that some people will butt heads and it is much better to vent about a person in a PM than it is to put it out on the open forum.
If any of you want to add your thoughts…feel free…I promise I won’t get my panties in a wad.
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