Yep, I've been Wootin' Off since midnight!
http://www.woot.com/
http://www.woot.com/
Sorry I forgot to tell you - it's a Woot-Off!
- Thread starter Fisher's Mom
- Start date
Deadly Sushi
Formerly The Giant Mojito
And its sold out?????
Hey, don't dis the Woot Monkey, Sushi! I have over a dozen of them (but none of the key-chain ones.) It's sort of a woot consolation prize for not getting a Bag of Crap.
Deadly Sushi
Formerly The Giant Mojito
bag of crap?
Here's the description of one of the Bags of Crap I've been fortunate enough to buy. Actually, they are all just like this.
by Wootbot on June 1, 2007 at 3:27 PM
Order THREE, just like in olden times!
That’s right. We’ve changed our minds again. For this Bag O’Crap, you’ll need to tell us you want THREE craps in your ONE bag, or suffer the scorn and pity of your peers. Why the change? Because it pleases us. That is all.
As usual, you’d be way better off not wasting even a pittance like $8 on this junk. To call it garbage is an insult to honest, hard-working garbage, because you can’t even put this stuff on your compost pile. Probably the most valuable thing in your BOC will be the box it’s shipped in. The Bag O’Crap is essentially a legal way for us to steal your money. If this hasn’t been enough to dissuade you, if you simply must press on despite all your more sensible instincts, remember:
1. WHEN YOU ORDER THIS ITEM, YOU’LL GET ONE BAG WITH (up to) THREE CRAPS IN IT.
2. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR SELECTING THE QUANTITY OF THREE WHEN YOU ORDER.
3. YOU WILL WASTE FREIGHT IF YOU ORDER FEWER THAN THREE.
Let’s review. One bag. However many craps you choose, up to three. So make it three. That’s THREE! 3! Tres! Drei! San! Trois!
If you temporarily forget your numbers and you inadvertently select less than three, you can try emailing service@woot.com. Once they’re finished laughing at you, perhaps they’ll amend your order. Perhaps not. They’re unpredictable. If you’re lucky, you’ll get three pieces of crap instead of one. Whoopee. Sometimes more isn’t better.
THE HOLY CRAP COMMANDMENTS v2.0:
I. Thou shalt expect nothing beyond one bag of some kind and your chosen quantity of crappy items (which should be THREE).
II. Thou shalt not whine and complain when some people’s crap turns out to be nicer than yours.
III. Thou shalt take a moment to consider whether you might be better off just not buying this crap.
IV. Thou shalt not order just one crap and blame it on anything but your own inattention.
V. To paraphrase Stephen Stills, shalt thou not get the crap you want, want the crap you get.
by Wootbot on June 1, 2007 at 3:27 PM
Order THREE, just like in olden times!
That’s right. We’ve changed our minds again. For this Bag O’Crap, you’ll need to tell us you want THREE craps in your ONE bag, or suffer the scorn and pity of your peers. Why the change? Because it pleases us. That is all.
As usual, you’d be way better off not wasting even a pittance like $8 on this junk. To call it garbage is an insult to honest, hard-working garbage, because you can’t even put this stuff on your compost pile. Probably the most valuable thing in your BOC will be the box it’s shipped in. The Bag O’Crap is essentially a legal way for us to steal your money. If this hasn’t been enough to dissuade you, if you simply must press on despite all your more sensible instincts, remember:
1. WHEN YOU ORDER THIS ITEM, YOU’LL GET ONE BAG WITH (up to) THREE CRAPS IN IT.
2. YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR SELECTING THE QUANTITY OF THREE WHEN YOU ORDER.
3. YOU WILL WASTE FREIGHT IF YOU ORDER FEWER THAN THREE.
Let’s review. One bag. However many craps you choose, up to three. So make it three. That’s THREE! 3! Tres! Drei! San! Trois!
If you temporarily forget your numbers and you inadvertently select less than three, you can try emailing service@woot.com. Once they’re finished laughing at you, perhaps they’ll amend your order. Perhaps not. They’re unpredictable. If you’re lucky, you’ll get three pieces of crap instead of one. Whoopee. Sometimes more isn’t better.
THE HOLY CRAP COMMANDMENTS v2.0:
I. Thou shalt expect nothing beyond one bag of some kind and your chosen quantity of crappy items (which should be THREE).
II. Thou shalt not whine and complain when some people’s crap turns out to be nicer than yours.
III. Thou shalt take a moment to consider whether you might be better off just not buying this crap.
IV. Thou shalt not order just one crap and blame it on anything but your own inattention.
V. To paraphrase Stephen Stills, shalt thou not get the crap you want, want the crap you get.
Here's one of my favorite Woots, which I purchased 3 of (that's 72 of them) because I have teenaged sons and because the description made me laugh my ass off:
Trojan Elexa Ultra Sensitive Condom – 24 Pack
Woot by Wootbot on June 20, 2008 at 9:14 PM
It was a sunny afternoon in March when she stopped by Woot’s creative offices. She said she was there to sell us ink cartridges for the office printer—but as it would happen, she also ushered our two wide-eyed interns into manhood. She called herself Elexa. What a vision! She was thin, but strong. Sophisticated, but sort of trashy. She did not give off too strong an odor of latex. Homer and Jake were no match for this seductress.
One at a time, she led them into our utility storage room—a room no one wants to go into anymore, thanks a lot Homer and Jake—and tutored them in the ways of physical love. But before she began, she asked each of them: “you don’t want me to be with child, do you?”
Homer and Jake both answered no. “In that case,” she said, “you’ll have to wear one of these.” And she produced reservoir-tipped prophylactics from America’s number one condom manufacturer, Trojan, a name that’s been trusted for over 80 years, though one hopes not by any single user continuously.
Then she thrilled and deflowered each of our interns in an order they determined by rock-paper-scissors. They’ll remember that day the rest of their lives—because when they left that utility storage room, they left their innocence behind. Along with like 15 reams of paper that no one wants to use anymore, since who knows what happened on it.
Homer and Jake didn’t speak to each other about that day for some time. Then, six weeks later, Jake turned to Homer in the middle of a big Fed-Ex envelope-stuffing project and asked “hey, you remember that ink saleslady? In the utility storage room?”
“Do I?” Homer said. “That was the most exciting 17 seconds of my life!”
“Me too,” Jake said. “But I’ve been thinking. Do you really care if she becomes ‘with child?’”
“I guess not especially,” Homer said.
“Me neither,” said Jake. “And seeing as how I don’t care that much—and you don’t care that much—what do you say we take these things off?”
And that’s why we have a seven-year supply of ink cartridges now, and why interns are no longer authorized to place purchase orders.
Warranty: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Features:
Trojan Elexa Ultra Sensitive Condom – 24 Pack
Woot by Wootbot on June 20, 2008 at 9:14 PM
It was a sunny afternoon in March when she stopped by Woot’s creative offices. She said she was there to sell us ink cartridges for the office printer—but as it would happen, she also ushered our two wide-eyed interns into manhood. She called herself Elexa. What a vision! She was thin, but strong. Sophisticated, but sort of trashy. She did not give off too strong an odor of latex. Homer and Jake were no match for this seductress.
One at a time, she led them into our utility storage room—a room no one wants to go into anymore, thanks a lot Homer and Jake—and tutored them in the ways of physical love. But before she began, she asked each of them: “you don’t want me to be with child, do you?”
Homer and Jake both answered no. “In that case,” she said, “you’ll have to wear one of these.” And she produced reservoir-tipped prophylactics from America’s number one condom manufacturer, Trojan, a name that’s been trusted for over 80 years, though one hopes not by any single user continuously.
Then she thrilled and deflowered each of our interns in an order they determined by rock-paper-scissors. They’ll remember that day the rest of their lives—because when they left that utility storage room, they left their innocence behind. Along with like 15 reams of paper that no one wants to use anymore, since who knows what happened on it.
Homer and Jake didn’t speak to each other about that day for some time. Then, six weeks later, Jake turned to Homer in the middle of a big Fed-Ex envelope-stuffing project and asked “hey, you remember that ink saleslady? In the utility storage room?”
“Do I?” Homer said. “That was the most exciting 17 seconds of my life!”
“Me too,” Jake said. “But I’ve been thinking. Do you really care if she becomes ‘with child?’”
“I guess not especially,” Homer said.
“Me neither,” said Jake. “And seeing as how I don’t care that much—and you don’t care that much—what do you say we take these things off?”
And that’s why we have a seven-year supply of ink cartridges now, and why interns are no longer authorized to place purchase orders.
Warranty: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Features:
- Low latex odor and premium lubricant
- Provide a closer, more intimate connection and greater comfort
- Designed thin yet manufactured with Trojan strength and reliability
- Straight Walled condom design with Reservoir End
- Trojan is America’s number 1 condom and trusted for over 80 years
- Trojan Elexa Ultra Sensitive products expire September 2010
- Triple Tested Trojan Quality
- Reduces the risk of unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases
- Trojan Elexa Ultra Sensitive Condom (bulk packed, not in retail box)
Now that you mention it......Sounds like the fire bags on Halloween porches.
Oh, and BTW, the Woot-Off is over - this one was only a 1 day version.